We went to Copperhead Island yesterday. Then to Petsmart (just to see the cats) and McDonald's.
I'm getting used to it, this whole infedility thing. It doesn't really weigh on my conscience as much as it used to.
Not long after Oliver was born, we went to Quizno's for lunch as a family. Only Colin was in school, so he wasn't there. It was such a weird feeling, doing something fun without him. All I could think was, "Anyone watching us right now has no idea that we have another son." Like I was denying Colin's existence, just by doing something with everyone but him. It felt so wrong. This is a very new experience for me.
Since Chad is still on paternity leave, we have done many activities sans Colin, and everytime we do, I try not to mention it to him later. I feel bad for the guy. Working hard at school while the four of us are together, having fun.
But he always notices if there is a new McDonald's toy in the house, and he also likes to ask us what we did that day, and Chad, who thinks I need to "get over it," feels free to rub it in each and every time.
That's okay. I really am getting over it, and I think Colin is too.
