After reading some of the comments on my previous post about real vs. fake Christmas trees, I felt my resolve about this being our last real tree wavering a little. I was reminded of the many many things I love about real trees, and especially how much I loved them when I was a child. I started to wonder if maybe we should continue with real trees for the sake of our children and the memories we are creating for them. But this was the year of the World's Worst Christmas Tree, and it sealed the fate of all future Coleman Family Christmas Trees. The verdict is in and, they will be fake. In fact, we already bought a Christmas tree for next year off of Amazon (if you do follow the link, we actually got the 7 1/2 ft version of the one shown, and for a much better price) and the UPS guy dropped it off on my doorstep about ten minutes ago ( our UPS guy always come after 6:30 pm, which seems strange to me).
What made it the World's Worst Christmas Tree? Besides the crooked trunk, it had mysteriously pokey and painful pine needles. When I first tried to scoop together the needles into a pile underneath to clean up after we put the tree up , I found that I just couldn't do it. Way too painful for my fingers. I actually had to get my gardening gloves out before I could finish the job.
Despite watering the tree almost daily, the needles on the tree got sharper and sharper. It got to the point where I refused to rehang any ornaments that fell off. They stayed huddled in a pitiful heap under the tree because my hands said it just wasn't worth it, and there were only about twenty left on the tree by Christmas. My kids also knew to steer clear of the very unfriendly tree, and they wouldn't go anywhere near it (unless on a bike). When Audra was here on Sunday, she went to touch it without being properly warned and pulled her hand back with a little yelp. It was seriously that bad. Also, by this point we were using an old computer moniter to hold the tree stand down, since I had to use my sewing machine for the nativity costumes.
We started to take the mean little tree down the day after Christmas, and Colin came up with a great idea. He immediately rushed into the kitchen and grabbed some oven mitts to protect hands while he took ornaments off. Smart boy!
So long, farewell real Christmas trees. May you go to a home where you will be loved unconditionally. Try giving my cousin Olivia or brother-in-law Seth a call if you are looking for a good family.
