Keepin' It Real Wednesday

Last Wednesday I went to ballet class.   I held my chest and chin up with my ballerina gaze, waltzing and pirouetting until my calves ached and my back was drenched with sweat.  For an hour and a half I was grace and determination

I went home, put the harness on Lemon, and walked her down our trail.  I left my phone at home and basked in the dark shadows and bright sunshine of the leaveless trees.  For half an hour I was strength and serenity

When we got home, Lemon napped at my feet as I cooked and did laundry.  My Mindy Gledhill station sang out from Pandora as I cooked Masaman for school lunches the next day and chow mein and spring rolls for dinner.   The clock counted the minutes until my kids would step off the bus. Everything would be ready - clothes in drawers, food on the table, mom happy to see them. For three hours I was energy and confidence

Fifteen minutes before their bus was set to arrive, a realization jolted through me.

The four youngest were not taking the bus today.  I had reminded them and sent two of their teachers notes telling them they would be car riders......

So that we could get to a music class, which started in fifteen minutes and was half an hour away......

.....AND I should have been at the school half an hour ago to pick them up - the school that was twenty minutes away.

For the rest of the night I was panic and shame.

And there is a possibility that I might be writing this Keepin' It Real Wednesday as a reminder to myself that they are car riders today

In addition to the three reminders on my phone

and the alarm that Colin set up on Alexa.

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

The other day I was taking the kids to school in the morning.  When they hopped out, some stuff fell out too and had to be picked up and put back in by one of the kids.  Have you ever had that happen?  Like we aren't conspicuous enough, with six kids dashing out, while I wave my arms in a circle saying "Go go go!" like a chubby drill sergeant in a dress and barefeet.*  Today when I dropped my kids off, the teacher in carpool, remarked, "Wow.  It's like a clown car.  They just keep coming."

So, I decided to clean my van out, to try to deflect a little of the embarrassment (at least the mivi-van related embarrassment.)  This was the pile of stuff that was in the van but didn't belong there, after the trash was thrown away. Amazing, I know.  I would like to highlight a few of these items. Besides the library book in the front, which has cost me at least $20 in twenty-five cents a day late fees (so worth it for the random facts Oliver can now spout when he is supposed to be doing "more important things" like homework or finding a pair of socks for school), there are a number of note-worthy items.

Note the title, and then note the teeth marks on the bottom right corner.  Lemon Sugar does not approve.

See these comforters?  They were left at my Dad's house in JUNE during a cousin sleepover.  They were just retrieved last week.  What have Gabe and Oliver been using for blankets in the meantime? I dunno, dirty towels or something.  Who knows. 

And one of my favorites.  An RC car that has been broken for YEARS.  The perfect toy to bring in the van. 

Not noted:

Dozens of markers and broken pencils

Every scrap of paper used at church

Church shoes

Amazon packages that were supposed to be returned

A neck pillow that was brought for relief on a strenuous 2 hr drive across the border to Virginia 

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

This morning started off rough.  Gabe stayed home from school sick (read: very tired and ultimately, very bored). Everyone was slow to get going and when our carpool van showed up, Oliver did not have his backpack on yet.  When I went to get it, I found that it was still in the van from the previous day, and then discovered that he had unfinished homework inside (rows and rows of Chinese characters to write).  I quickly wrote the teacher a note  saying he would bring his homework tomorrow (which I have never done) and sent the freaking-out kid out the door.

The kindergarten adjustment has been a tough one for my guy and he is reacting in the same manner than he has reacted to every big adjustment in his life: waking up over and over again at night, lots of emotions spilling over,  heels dug in with all his might and needing my constant love and affection without knowing how to show that that is what he needs.  I know him and I know he will get through this.  I know his teacher and I know that when Colin had her he cried every single night about not wanting to go to school the next day.  She is a good teacher-no one can doubt her desire to help the children learn and grow-but she is tough.  When Ollie’s folder came home today, it had a post-it note addressed to me, informing me that homework is supposed to be returned the next day and reminding me that she discussed that with me at the parent –teacher conference.  Thanks.

Those kindergartener emotions didn’t just spill over tonight – they gushed over, drenching the whole household.  I put the homework back away until tomorrow morning and took him to bed, where he was asleep before 7. 

Carina just feel asleep so now it is my chance to munch on carrot sticks while I watch The Host and fold laundry.

 

Did I mention?  Chad is in New York.  He is eating at Bobby Flay’s restaurant as I type this.  Oh, and he just sent me this picture:

Winning.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

Sometimes I wonder if, because of these posts, my Wednesdays all seem a little too “real.”  I often find myself easily composing a Keepin’ It Real post in my head……and honestly, in the end, most of those posts are too complaining and self pitying to put into permanent record.  Maybe it is because it is the middle of the week and stress it its peak.  Maybe it is because sometimes if I am looking to write about something less-than-perfect, my whole life seems far-from-perfect.

Shortly before bedtime tonight I declared that we were never ever having any more kids.  It was one of those Wednesdays – when nothing was satisfyingly as- it- should- be.  My patience was thin, my groceries were unbought, my carpet was disgusting, my kids were unruly. 

Maybe it was because it was a Wednesday and I was looking for reality instead of grace, maybe it was because I really do have more on my plate than I can handle and my life is a huge, dramatic failure…….but maybe it was simply because I haven’t been going to bed when I should and have had sick kids and no exercise.

Maybe, just maybe, the solution is boring and simple and even just a little bit my own fault.

Yep, probably.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

We spent the morning as a family at Epcot.  Oliver was dragging, not wanting to walk at all, and we couldn’t blame him.  He was sick yesterday morning (after a less-than-stellar day at Magic Kingdom on Monday).  He is our kid who will throw up in the morning and be eating and running around by dinnertime, with no one else in the family getting sick at all.  Yesterday, sure enough, he was eating again by 11 am with no further incidents and we were just thankful it happened on our day off. 

While I rode Soarin’  today at Epcot with Gabe and Colin, Chad got the other two a snack.  Ollie said his stomach hurt and then laid down on the ground and almost went to sleep.  As soon as we got off the ride, we decided that Ollie, Carina and I would go back home for the rest of the day so Ollie could take a nap and regain his energy.  Chad would drive us back so they would have the van.  Right as drove down the street that leads to our condo, Oliver threw up all over the seat of our (month-old) van.  I scrambled back there and handed him the pool bag in desperation, and Chad got to spend the next hour taking care of the van. 

I have to tell you that I am disappointed.  Disappointed that our vacation has been invaded by sickness.  Disappointed that my little boy hasn’t had the time of his life.  Disappointed that I haven’t had the time of my life.  Disappointed that we came here in October to avoid the crowds and they are HERE. Disappointed that Chad is at Epcot with the boys without me.

It is silly though, right?  How can I be let down? To be able to spend a week with my family in a nice, spacious condo with a bed for everyone.  To spend four days at the Magic Kingdom without pinching our pennies.  I can’t really be disappointed in the easy life I lead, and the hours of fun we have still had.

When I sat and thought about that this afternoon, I realized that what I am most disappointed in is this:  that despite six months of planning on my part – researching tickets and condos, planning healthy meals, knowing when to ride what, coordinating matching colors each day (for crying out loud) – despite all my good intentions of trying to match this trip as smooth and AWESOME as possible, something happened that was completely out of my control to make it less than awesome. 

I hate that.  Don’t you?  It makes me a little sick to my stomach because it brings to mind my helplessness.  It makes me think about the fact that even when I do everything “right,”  bad stuff still happens…stuff way more serious that a couple days of barfing.  My heart starts to beat hard and loud in my chest with those thoughts. 

Identifying that fear helped me a feel so much better though.  Because fear can be replaced by faith every time.  And even though I hate to think that my kid had to be sick to bring me back to that faith, it did. For the first time this week, I took the time to sit down in the quiet, after Oliver and Carina went to sleep, to read my scriptures and pray.  When I did, my blessings lined up right before my eyes, dwarfing my disappointments.

 

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

After setting Ollie up with a snack yesterday, I went upstairs to shower, taking Carina with me. At some point she must have wandered downstairs, and as I was finishing up, I heard Ollie yelling,

“Mom!!! Carina is on the counter!”

“Okay, Ollie.  I am coming.” (continuing to get dressed)

“MOM!!!! Carina is on the counter!!!! Come get her!!!”

“Ollie, I am coming.  Calm down.”  (putting deodorant on)

“MOMMMMMMM!”

At which point I walk downstairs to find this:

 

What is wrong with my children?!!!!!

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

Last Monday, I tried a new plant- strong recipe – Red Lentil Dahl, served over brown rice.  Bursting with exotic flavors and loaded with nutrients, I was planning to take a picture and post it as a Meatless Monday recipe. 

I tasted it as it cooked.  One of the spices was completely overpowering (was it the whole tablespoon of coriander? probably),  but since the last step was to add in one more spice, I figured that star-of-a-spice was going to to balance everything out. 

I was wrong.  It was so awful that I couldn’t eat more than a few bites.  I will eat just about anything, so you can trust that it was just basically inedible. As Chad said, it tasted like gargling dishsoup. Dishsoap with lentils.  I can’t tell you how much I hate spending time on a pot of good, healthy food, and then tossing it in the trash. I heated up some chili beans to dump on top off our brown rice, and that was dinner.  Yes, rice and beans. Healthy, yes. Satisfying, no.

We had Family Home Evening later.  I taught the lesson, and Colin, who was in charge of the activity, decided to team up with Gabe, who was in charge of treat, for a very classy combination of the two:  a trip to the nearest gas station, which recently made the transition into a 7 Eleven.  The plan was for the boys to partake of their first-ever Slurpees.  By the way, the boys thought we were calling them Slurpees as a joke and would not believe that was their real name until they saw it written on the cup (maybe we tease too much?).  Everytime they said it, they laughed.  SLURPEES! So funny.

After they filled their cups with the icy sugar water, they saw the greasy hot dogs and corndogs spinning on their rollers, and droll started dripping from their chins.  I could almost hear their rice-and-bean-filled stomachs growling as they begged us for them.  I looked at Chad, who I was sure was feeling as hungry as me, and we caved.

Which is how it became  Meaty Monday.  Classy, sugary, Meaty Monday. YUM.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

Gabe’s end-of-the-year party was today.  Sabina offered to watch Ollie and Carina while I went, but I just used her on Monday for Colin’s party, and this was supposed to be an easy-going little get-together, so I opted to take them with. 

I loaded our sit-and-stand stroller with cupcakes for Gabe’s class, cheerios, a sippy cup and toys for Carina, and of course Carina and Ollie, and hauled it into a spot by a little table in the back of Gabe’s class.  The teacher started out by having the kids sing, and soon she brought the kids to the front, one by one.  They read from a portfolio in Chinese and everyone clapped. Cute, fun, very nice.  Only this:  each one was taking almost 5 minutes.  And she wasn’t going straight through.  She stopped every two or three kids and had them sing two or three songs.  There are 25 kids in the class.  You do the math. 

Carina was great for the first half hour, which for her is almost amazing. The second that she wriggled out of her straps and stood up in her seat, I knew we were in trouble.  The stroller spell was broken and she would never ever sit still again. And then she:

Screamed when I tried to help her with her cheerios.

Screamed when I tried to help her sit in one of the little chairs.

Fell out of the chair.

Screamed when I tried to help her drink a juice box.

Threw the juice box on the ground.

Got happy when the teacher’s assistant got out a puppet to play with.

Screamed when she saw there were dolly puppets she wasn’t playing with.

Screamed when I only gave her two of the those puppets.

And on and on and on for two and a half hours.  I tried to think what I could possibly do.   I couldn’t leave until Gabe was done because he was coming home with me.  I couldn’t take her in the hall, where her screaming would interrupt the rest of the classes.  I could only give in to her screams and try and hard as I possibly could to keep her lips zipped.

And so I was that parent today, in front of a dozen other parents. I will do whatever the heck you want, dear child, just shut the heck up.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

This is one of those womanly posts.  You have been warned.

I am a lucky woman.

I am one of those women you love to hate.

No, it’s not my perfectly flat butt.  (My mom didn’t like the word butt growing up, so she would always say, “Jeppsons don’t have butts!” And it’s true.)

No, it’s not my acne at age 31.

Seriously, you are going to hate me when you hear this.

After giving birth, I usually go over a year without any visits from….you know….our dreaded Aunt Flo. 

Yes indeed….11 months with Colin, 15 with Gabe, 15 with Oliver, and we have yet to find out with Carina.

Is that a weird thing to talk about on my blog?  I kind of think it is, but then when I think about it more, it is no less personal than a birth story, and I want women out there to know that this is a possible benefit of breastfeeding.

NO PERIOD FOR 2 YEARS! SPREAD THE WORD!!!!

Notice I said possible. Don’t be a total dummy and rely on it, and don’t be all jeal if you don’t get this benefit, hater.

So anyway, once my babies hit one year, I am a ticking time-bomb. 

When I find myself literally pulling my hair when my kids scream….

or every thing Chad says seems annoyingly condescending….

or my back has a little ache…….

or my stomach seems to poke out even more than usual…..

I think, OH NO!  This is it!  It is back!

And then a week passes with nothing and I realize, nope, it is just me……irritable me with the creaky body and belly pouch.  Just me. 

And then I  remember that once a month I am going to be irritable me times ten.

Tick tock. Tick tock.

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it - the disposing of dirty diapers.

While performing this unpleasant task one time, Chad chuckled and told me that sometimes he thought about how awful/hilarious it would be to take the disgusting diapers, box them up, and then mail them to someone. They would be so excited to get a surprise package in the mail, and then....WHAM, the smell would hit them. 

Awwwwwww.

I love my husband for many many reasons, but the fact that he came up with this sinister idea makes me fall in love with him over and over again...

every single time I see a bag of smelly diapers.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

What a difference 24 hours can make.

Last night at this time, Chad and I were strategically gluing the weights on Colin’s first “real” Pinewood Derby car, making plans about what we all needed to do finish it in the next 24 hrs, in order to be ready for the race tonight.

(I know Colin is not included in that sentence, and it is his car, so he really should be….. but this is Keepin’ It Real Wednesday).

Not long after, Gabe threw up in the bowl he had recently requested.  How sad – he won’t be ale to go to Colin’s race Wednesday night.

A couple of hours later, Colin joined him.  How very very sad. No race for anyone.

A couple of hours later, I awoke to the sound of Carina throwing up next to me. Poor poor baby, but I need sleep forcryingoutloud.

And who knows when…Oliver stumbled into our bedroom, eyes barely open, covered in vomit.   I think Chad is handling that, right? Zzzzzzzz

It was a loooooong day, followed by a long day of Smurfs, Mr. Popper’s Penquins, Saltines and Moneyball for Chad and I.  The “good news” was that Chad had already requested the day off to go the Dr. for what he thought was strep throat, so he was home and washed loads and loads of laundry and Lysoled everything.  

So here we are, 24 hours later, and while all the other Cub Scouts are racing their cars, Colin is sleeping with a bowl next to him.

Here’s to hoping to health by Friday…..

which is the big Chinese’s New Year celebration…..

and…

Chad’s birthday. Gulp.

Please don’t let him be sick on his birthday….

or me, because that is almost as awful for him.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

Four to five o’clock on any weekday evening is bad enough.  I have addressed that before.  Today, that hour was a real doozy.

It began with a baby who has turned very mobile in the last week.  Like, crawling, sitting, pulling-herself-up, into everything mobile.  I don’t mind that, but it has been accompanied by a sudden realization that she is a separate being from me….a realization that if she isn’t in my arms she doesn’t know where her next warm and milky meal is going to come from.  She alternates between blissfully roaming the floor,  sweeping every piece of dirt with her pant legs and stuffing every loose piece of trash in the house in her mouth, to crawling frantically to my feet and whining like a drooling little puppy dog. I haven’t quite realized yet right at four o’clock, the whimpering little sleepy puppy dog comes out in full force, making it nearly impossible to make dinner (remember tomorrow Katie – make dinner earlier!) 

So, right as we came home,  I was dealing with that, along with an I-was-good-at-school-all-day-so-I-am-ball-of-emotions fit from Gabe.  I sent Gabe to his room and Colin and Ollie outside to play.  I was feeding Carina while looking up a recipe when Ollie came inside and informed me that he pooped. In his underwear.  I feel like I talk about kid poop way too much on here, so I will spare you the details.  Let’s just say the underwear went in the trash and the kid went in the shower. 

No sooner than I got Oliver out of the shower, Colin came in and exclaimed, “Mom, there is green paint all over the garage!”  I ran in there to find that a can of paint had somehow been knocked off the shelf and spilled, rolled under my van, and then pooled in a big mess under there.  I grabbed two old towels and cleaned it up the best I could while Carina fussed in the house.

Washing my hands off, I swooped up Carina and headed to the kitchen to see how far I could get in the dinner preparation with a baby in one arm.  Carina reached her chubby little arm out  just enough to swipe at a glass sitting on the counter, and CRASH…one more mess to clean up.

Now, at this point I probably would have just ordered pizza, but I had just ordered pizza (and lots of it) the day before when I was grumpy, in a bite-me-bad-day sort of rebellion, and I had been eating the leftovers all day long. 

So pumpkin soup it was, made mostly by Chad when he came home.

Let me tell you something….pumpkin soup is not pizza.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

What you didn’t see from yesterday’s pictures:

I had been waiting to take Carina’s pictures until she was strong enough to sit on her behind all by herself.  It wasn’t quite happening and I was afraid that the flowers were going to die soon, so we just went for it one evening. I sat her down, set up the shot, and……..

 

…down she went .

Which is why all the rest of the shots are of her laying on her belly.

Also not shown:

The freeway exit that was right next to the field of flowers.

Three anxious boys who were ready to go buy pumpkins.

A grumpy mom,  insisting that they just zip it while she gets her pictures, gosh darnit.

Man, that picture makes me laugh every time I look at it.

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

With all the lovely pictures I have been seeing of kids frolicking among the orange-hued fields of pumpkins and meandering through corn mazes, I thought I would share our family’s trip to the local “pumpkin patch” …….

…..Sprawl-mart.

                          

(complete with a trip down the ice cream aisle, to make the trip a little more worth it for Mom and Dad)

Keepin’ It Real Wednesday

 

Yesterday we stopped by my parent’s house to say goodbye to my sister Ashley, who had been visiting with her family from Missouri.  I brought my camera to snap some pictures of Carina with her cousin Claire, who is one month younger than her.  We said our goodbyes and went home, where we had a fairly uneventful afternoon – rest time and a trip to the pool.  As I was getting out of the pool, I realized my arms felt very weak holding Carina.  Then my whole body started to ache.  Within a couple of hours I was laying in bed, aching all over with the chills and some other “womanly” pains. Mastitis. Oy.

I went to bed early only to be woken by a very fussy baby.  Her nose was so stuffed up that she couldn’t catch her breath lying down.  We shuffled around the darkhouse, looking for the bulb syringe, and she screamed as I cleared it out.  It wasn’t enough though, and I ended on the recliner downstairs so that she could sleep upright.  Me with my achy body, her with her stuffy nose, waking up sweaty every couple of hours to nurse and reposition ourselves.  After one such session, I lay awake, listening to her wet breathing, and these pictures kept skating across my mind.

 

I had laughed as I lay Claire on top of Carina and snapped away, but in my sleeplessness last night, all I could picture were the germs oozing off of Carina to Claire. 

  Sorry Ashley!  Here’s to hoping Claire is immune to the results of her Aunt’s foolish photography whims and fancies.

Keepin’ it Real Wednesday

This pretty much sums up the day we are having over here.

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

 This is a post about baby poo.

I think the pictures tell the story, but to sum it up in the words of my friend Autumn 

"So glamorous our lifestyle, no?"

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

This is a post is about poop. Just a little warning for you.  You are welcome.

Carina has been a little fussy today.  This is very unusual for her, as long as I haven't been eating dairy.  I haven't been, so I was wondering what was going on, 'til I remembered that she hasn't had a good poo in four or five days.  As she fussed, I layed her on her back and pushed her legs toward her tummy.  She immediately let out some nice gas, so I knew that the system back-up was her problem.

But alas, this post is not about sweet baby poo.  Oh no.

As I lay with the fussy baby on my bed, trying to get her to sleep, I was also trying to get her older brother Oliver to lay still for ten consecutive minutes so he could drift off for a desperately needed nap.  I was turned away from him when I heard yelling, "I have____ on my hands!"

And no, this post is not even about my own child's poo.

The screaming was coming from the other room, where I had put my nephew down for a nap.  I had no idea what he was saying was on his hands. I told him to come into the bedroom, and as he did, I saw for myself.  Poop.  And I saw that he had no diaper on.

Further inspection and the poopy diaper was found in the other bedroom. Poop was not just on his hands.  Oh no.  It was also on the walls, my friends.

As I scrubbed the brown hands, walls, and behind, I reminded myself over and over again, "Your parents have been barfed on by your kids.  Bobby has taken care of Ollie in the dead of the night.  You can clean up your almost-3-year-old nephew's poo with patience and understanding."

I got through it and went on with my day, pushing it from my mind 'til I sat down here at the computer, Carina on my lap, fussing a little because she still hasn't pooped.  Then I remembered, and I thought,

"Well now, that's the most exciting thing that has happened today."

Which is the part I find "funniest" of all.

For similar posts, please see here and here.

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

We pride ourselves on early, consistent, bedtimes for our kids. We have firm routines and we stick to them.

But Ollie is the kid who teaches us not to have pride. Despite having the same, strict routine with him since January, this is what "bedtime" looks like -

An hour after we have put him to bed, after we have ignored his screams, we see his light on and find this:

Some things to notice:

Gabe sound asleep despite the light.

Ollie's nightstand moved from beside his bed to in front of the light switch in order to turn on the light

No pants on, and diaper next to the baby gate.

A smile on Ollie's face.

Books and money on the floor.

Not pictured - the humidifier and Oliver's water cup (which were previously on the nightstand) thrown over the baby gate into the hall.


I know we will figure it all out, but for now, it's more than a little frustrating every night, I gotta admit.

Keepin' It Real Wednesday

Dear Nieces and Nephews,

Thank you for coming to my birthday party.

Thank you for the birthday hugs.

Thank you dancing with me.

But my little pals,

When I said, "No presents!"

I meant it.

Not even surprises left behind in the upstairs toilet.

Love,
Aunt Katie